hush

2006-05-17T13:25:00.000+08:00

I MOVED! OH.SO.STELLAR.ORG please change your links. thank you. very much.

MOVED

2006-05-17T13:22:00.000+08:00

I'm HOSTED!
HTTP://OH.SO-STELLAR.ORG

2006-05-17T13:17:00.000+08:00

HI, I've moved to HTTP://OH.SO-STELLAR.ORG. Please change your links. =)
Well, if you've linked me, that is.
click HERE

THANKS!
CARS

I GOT HOSTED

2006-05-10T14:12:00.000+08:00

Hey guys! Change your links to HTTP://OH.SO-STELLAR.ORG I've moved!

The IRONY that's called life

2006-05-06T14:02:00.000+08:00

We are all (not really) given the chance to speak our minds. Specially we Filipinos who belong to a democratic country, we are given the right to freely express our thoughts. I'm pretty sure we exercise this right quite oftenly seeing all the rallies, "anti" organizations and hate mails among others. Maybe I'm exaggerating, but it seems to me that we oust all our presidents , we create anti organizations about every person in this world, we forward hate mails to everyone. I'm sure you've heard of a little something that's called Crab Mentality.

A while ago, while surfing the very free internet, I've tumbled upon this page wherein she showed all signs of hating a person. She created drawings pertaining to this person who is politically involved. The drawings were good, but the message wasn't. Okay, so I'll be blunt about this: the drawings were all about our president, Gloria Macapagal Arroyo. From here on, I'd like you to know that I am neutral about our president. It doesn't mean that since I've shaken her hand (see past posts) I totally adore her. I'm being unbiased here. Honestly, I feel sorry for our president. Since she made the decision of running for president, I'm sure she has also made an oath to be strong. She has to have weighed the consequences of her actions and she should have expected to be under tremendous pressure. But can't we give the girl a break? She's still a person, afterall. Maybe I would never get the way politics works, I actually don't want to, but politics or no politics, she's still a person who has feelings. I'm pretty sure if she breaks down suddenly and cries, people would go around talking about how weak she is, and how she's over reacting. But, hey? Don't all of us feel at somepoint like the world has come crashing down? I mean, that's totally unfair. We, the people who have less complicated lives, lives not in danger of some organization, lives that can freely be lived for ourselves, are entitled to cry all the time. We are even encouraged to do so as a means of releasing pent up anger. Sure, she has made some mistakes but us being completely unsupportive of the one who has put their life aside for her fellowmen, doesn't really make things any better. Actually, things just get worse. Equality and decency has gone down the drain here. It's like prominent people are of another level. To some certain extent, they are because they've worked hard to pursue that position but then no matter how prominent a person becomes, they are still that. A human being. A person. Just like us. A person who makes mistakes all the time and apparently, being judged by their mistakes all the time too. Everyone's the villain here, can't we see that? It's a lose-lose situation. Why won't we just give it up and let someone actually just lead us? Pride. Oh, the irony that life is.

I can't really express what I really think about this, so I'm sorry if my point is going around in circles. I just hope you get what I mean.

Oh, and by the way, I've decided (kind of, not really, not final) to get hosted. Thanks to all those who offered! I really really appreciate it, but I've already picked Anna's. So, if ever I decide to get hosted, I'll pick her. Yeah. Sorry if this makes you mad or something. I will not be leaving blogger, I'm actually going to use blogger. Yey! I love blogger too much. Hope you tell me your opinions about this. Thanks...

Apparently, I'm a terrorist

2006-05-05T07:08:00.000+08:00

or rather, I look like one. Google can be very humorous sometimes. I typed "Catherine looks like" on the search bar in absence of any other better things to do and here's what I got: (Caution: very informal blog post ahead)

Catherine Looks Like A Terrorist
- LOL. No I so do NOT!
Catherine looks like Elena Dementieva
- Who the hell?
Catherine looks like a CATHERINE!!

- Of course I do. I mean. Doh.
Catherine looks like she has a black eye
- *gets a mirror* nope. no black eye there.
Catherine looks like she's found the stairway to heaven
- WOW! Oh, how I wish.
Catherine looks like someone who has just glimpsed some unspeakable horror
- Well, maybe when I've seen hmmm.. Santa Claus in a bikini.
Catherine looks like the kind of girl who loves to talk
- Tell that to my teachers, they might just believe that I do talk.
Catherine looks like our next logical target
- Logical target... for what?! Please don't shoot me.. I'm too young to die!
Catherine looks like a conceited ditsy person
- I believe I am NOT.
Catherine, looks like her...those eyes. NO!
- o.O .... fureaaky.
Catherine looks like a goddess above me
- ... okaaaay...

I'm supposed to blog about this topic that digs in deep to equality and all those insightful things but since it's seven am and i haven't gotten a blink of sleep, I apparently have no brain power left to finish it. So, I'm going to post that, I guess tomorrow when I've dozed even for a few minutes and I have fresh brain cells again. So instead, dear blogmates, I'm going to ask you a question...

Should I get a host?

Some people ask me if I want to be hosted by them..

and all I've said is that I'll think about it.

But ironically, I've signed up in some sites.

shocks. I really need to sleep.

Zzzzzzz...

wooh! freebies!

2006-05-04T00:04:00.000+08:00

Ohyeah, these freebies, only they can take.. they know who they are. So if by sheer coincidence you have the same name, please resist the temptations of taking these freebies. These freebies are for them only. You can request maybe.. I'd gladly make it.. IF i'm in the mood.

not as cookie-banned as i though i was

2006-05-03T01:48:00.000+08:00

April has practically zoomed out of the window and now, May has flown by. Just like most of you, the end of April for me is practically the end of summer -- the end of almost-carefree days. May is practically shouting at my face "SCHOOL'S JUST A STEP AWAY!!" and I'm hating it. I'm hating the fact that my summer hasn't been as productive as I planned it to be. I haven't discovered my "inner self" nor have I discovered my talent that would save the world from all kinds of evil doing! Well, not really. But that's besides the point. Truth be told, I'm feeling kind of disappointed at myself. I had big plans this summer, I had lists of things I would do but I think I haven't done any of them! I'm disappointed that I haven't evolved from this immature attitude of drawing plans and never doing them. It's just like a cellphone without load, a computer withour power, a body without a soul, a book without words -- totally worthless. Am I totally worthless? Despite my pessimistic nature, I guess I would have to say NO. I am a person God created to be part of this world and I believe I have purpose in this life.

But, oh, that is so much easier said than done.

The brighter side of things though, I've just found out from Candy Mag that there's a Go-Kart racing tracks in Sucat, Paranaque which is much, much closer than the ones in Subic. I am a Paranaqueña afterall! Interested? Here is their website! I'm so excited with this news, only problems is... how much? And can you actually rent the Karts or do you have to.. GOD FORBID.. buy?! But wait, seeing the pictures in their site, is it even open yet? Do they accept... civillians or is it a membership something. Oh gosh. Addicted much? So many questions...

And an update with my website: I just added downloadable layouts for free in the YOU section! You can also request for your own layouts for free also!

That's all, adios bloggers off to go to sleep where I'd dream of counting go-karts. Zzzz.

[EDIT] Oops! I actually forgot to blog about my title! LOL! Okay, I've realized that I'm not actually as cookie-banned as I initially though I was. I figured out that my dad said that we aren't allowed to buy junkfood, so essentailly, making cookies wouldn't mean breaking the rules. YES! We are meant to be. LOL. Destiny has found a way to bring us back together! And by the way, of course I asked my dad about this first! [/EDIT]

ANTISOCIAL, UNPRODUCTIVE, BORED, COOKIE-BANNED FREAK

2006-04-30T21:18:00.000+08:00

I'm uninspired and unproductive. Is it just the heat, or is summer just so boring this year? I've basically got nothing to blog about. Nothing much has happened since I last updated (which would be last Wednesday). I honestly feel like an anti-social, unproductive freak. I haven't called my friends and I haven't even gone out with them. Fate is playing games with me because everytime my friends and I decide that we are all available to go, something comes up in my life that makes all our plans backfire. My life can suck big time. I thought my summer would be packed -- my mom didn't even allow me to take any summer classes because she thought my summer is hectic enough. But, what's so hectic about sitting around all-day in front of my computer? I wish I had taken guitar lessons. Who knows? I might just be the next rockstar. Haha. Yeah right. I can't even eat anymore since my dad banned every kind of junkfood in our house. Oh joy! NOT. Even my beloved chocolate-chip cookies aren't allowed anymore. I think it's the end of my life! Okay. Way too much unnecessary drama there.

But still, what would you feel if someone took away your chocolate chip cookies? Or, replace chocolate chip cookies with some food you like.. I mean, really really like. Like chocolates for example.

Ohyeah, something did happen other than me staring at my computer for hours on end: I helped my mom with her groceries yesterday! It was quite an adventure really, and it was so so tiring. We went to Market! Market! to look for fancy table napkins but since there wasn't any, we went to Rustan's in Forbes but unfortunately, no fancy napkins there, too! We proceeded to Baclaran to look for a centerpiece (Did I mention that my mom is a caterer? So, yeah she is and that's why we need napkins and a centerpiece) I also got to buy a pair of... Havanas. LOL. After that, we went to SnR or Pricesmart to look for fancy napkins. But I guess all the fancy napkins have been plagued leaving us to resort to unfancy plain white table napkins. We went to Uniwide after that and I bought a plain dark green shirt which I'm planning to print a crossbone on or some ethnic pattern. Yeah. And that's it! Five crazy places in one day! Whew!

I guess that's all for now, I still have to wake up at 6 tomorrow because we have to attend a reunion in Batangas! Nooooo! It's way too hot!

THE BIG FAT "IF"

2006-04-26T22:30:00.000+08:00

When you're bored out of your brains and even being in front of the computer bores you, your mind plays tricks on you and makes even the most ordinary things, extraordinary. Well, in my case, my mind just found this book, "If Questions For Teens" which I previously thought to be completely pointless, quite interesting, and since I'm bored out of my mind, I decided to give it a try. So here are my most absurd, dreamy, out-of-this-world speculations to some random IF questions.

IF YOU COULD RANK YOUR THREE HIGHEST AMBITIONS FOR YOUR FUTURE, WHAT WOULD THEY BE?
So, screw my usual answer of to be successful" because that's just too cliche. Give me one person in this world who doesn't want to be successful? Honestly?

TO BE A MUSICIAN: Okay, okay.. I confess that I'm not gifted when it comes to playing instruments or singing, I guess I could play the piano but not in the "woah" sort of way and I know how to play some chords on the guitar, but I should face the fact that I'm just not a natural when it comes to these things. I think my love for listening to music is just so great that I want to be just like the musicians who gave music to me. Music is practically my life. It helps me go through a lot of stuff. I want to be a musician who can give someone else this feeling that there's still hope even when the world has turned its back on you because, the music... the music, it never will turn it back against you.
TO TRAVEL THE WORLD: I love travelling. I love the danger and rush that comes with it. I love how your life is laid down on the line and is always on a 50/50. I have a passion for seeing new things and going to new places and trying out new things. I've always had this dream that I'd live in a different country every year just so I can know how people live in different places.
TO BE RICH: Gaaah. Money, money, money. No, I am not obssessed with money and I don't worship it. I want to have money so it's one problem off my problem list. Let's face it, everyone... without money, you're a goner. Sure, money can't buy love, and love is all we need. But it's just so ironic, you know. So, you're in love, get married, have kids and all that jazz... but you don't have money -- how are you supposed to you know.. live? So, in an absurd way, money can buy love.

IF YOU WERE TO QUIT SCHOOL AT AGE SIXTEEN, HOW DO YOU THINK YOUR PARENTS WOULD REACT? Woah. That's one year from now! I think, my parents would die.

IF THE GOVERNMENT WERE TO DECIDE TO PAY KIDS MONEY NOT TO DO ONE THING, WHAT WOULD YOU SAY IT SHOULD BE? I guess that would be.. to not go to school! How cool is that? Slacking and getting paid for it!

IF THERE WAS TO BE ONE CLASS PERIOD EACH WEEK DEVOTED TO SOMETHING PRACTICAL AND USEFUL IN LIFE, WHAT SHOULD IT BE? Sleeping class! I believe that we should be taught how to sleep efficiently and comfortably so we could make the most out of the time we have left to sleep because of the school's endless assignments. yeah?

IF YOUR OLDER SISTER OR BROTHER AGREED TO LEND YOU ONE THING WHENEVER YOU WANTED IT, WHAT WOULD YOU PICK? I don't have an older sister, nor an older brother because guess what? I'm the oldest! But if I had one, it would be a cool older brother who drives and owns a nice car. I want his car sleek and black (or red would be fine) with a cool paint job and four-wheel drive. And yes, I would like to borrow it whenever I want it. That way, I don't have to pay for all the gas money!

---

Remember in my last post, I said that I was waiting for something special to happen on my birthday? Well, it DID happen, and it happened in Bubba Gump. My mom told the waiter that it was my birthday that day and as we were about to finish eating, he came up and held this cup of vanilla-strawberry ice cream with a candle and shouted... shouted "Today is Carine's birthday" and they all started to sing this song.. and all the people were looking at me. Oh gosh. It was so embarrassing yet fun at the same time! Haha. That was something to highlight my birthday.

I still have cotillion practice tomorrow.. ugh... I hate slash love dancing. I only love it when I'm alone.. haha. weird.

CAN'T TAKE THE HEAT

2006-04-23T16:03:00.000+08:00

I'm finally fifteen! One more year to go and I can legally drive a car. Yes! I really don't feel any different. I'm still the same old me - the same fourteen year-old I was yesterday. I don't really know why I anticipate my birthday so much. I guess, just like every other person, I expect something really life-altering to happen on this day. I guess life-altering is such a strong word, but what I think I'm saying is that people expect something...ANYTHING out of the ordinary to happen on their birthday. Afterall, it only happens once a year. I'm still waiting for that event though. Up to this moment of MY day, it's only been me and my computer, as usual.

My body is aching all over. I just got home last Friday from our Leadership Training in St. Paul Pasig. It turns out that it was actually an Asian Leadership Training and there were also delegates from Thailand, Hong Kong, Korea, Indonesia and JAPAN. There were also delegates from Sendai! (Sendai in Japan, is the place where I had my youth-exchange thingy last summer) Cool, right? Honestly, this year's leadership training is one of the worst. The WORST actually! All we did was sit and listen to some boring speaker. I mean honestly, how do they expect us to listen to two days worth of seeing a single speaker with a single topic?

Karla, me and Neill in the Convention Hall

Jeremy, Neill, Karla and me in the road of.. DEATH!

I'm going to post more tomorrow. I'm too lazy to do anything. It's too hot to move.

THANKS TO ALL THOSE WHO GREETED!!
I REALLY APPRECIATE IT!

SENTIMENTS OF A COMPUTER-DEPRIVED TEEN

2006-04-17T20:18:00.000+08:00

So, I'm actually still alive. I never knew I could survive that long (as in ONE WEEK) without my dear computer and ipod. Come to think of it, for most of my summer so far I'm usually just sitting in front of my computer in a very secluded room. Shocking as it is, the change of scenery and routine while we were in the province didn't actually disturb me as much as I expected it to. I guess this is one of my sacrifices and I'm glad I got to do it. My life, after all, is laid down for the LORD and the LORD ALONE.

PALM SUNDAY was as normal as it could be. As we do annually, we go to my lola's old house just across the street and have breakfast with the church people (as in choir, sacristan, etc.). We went to the province last Monday and arrived at about 6:30. My HOLY MONDAY was spent swimming. Eek. Not really that holy, ey? HOLY TUESDAY, my other cousins arrived and we swam with them. HOLY WEDNESDAY was again spent swimming and more cousins arrived. HOLY THURSDAY was spent watching movies. From Lava Girl and Sharkboy to Harry Potter and Bee Season, our movies were obviously randomly picked. We also heard mass then after eating dinner, we had our Visita Iglesia wherein we visited different churches in Tagaytay. After the Visita Iglesia, we ate at McDonalds like we always do. GOOD FRIDAY was a movie marathon day, but at night we watched Passion of the Christ. It's the second time I watched the movie but its impact is still as great. You should watch it if you haven't and see how the Lord suffer much just for us. Awww. After watching, we went to the church and visited the dead Christ. It was really a time of prayer and reflection and I was really focused. I love the place we went to since it really looked like a tomb and people actually know when silence is due. I had a great time reflecting and praying while listenning to religious songs! BLACK SATURDAY was spent swimming and that's why, ladies and gentlemen, I'm so sore in the face right now and obviously, darker. I had fun!! We went home that day and passed by the KFC walk-through for dinner, which is like no other! haha.. instead of cars passing, people actually have to walk. doh. I slept at around 2 in the morning and had to wake up at 4 for the salubong on Easter Sunday. After mass, I went with my relatives since my family was still fast asleep at home. Well, sucks for them, they didn't have free breakfast in McDo! hahaha!! Lunch time was spent with my relatives again and we had an Easter Egg Hunt. I earned P45 there! Whooot!! Although, my other cousin got a hundred. Boo. After lunch, I slept since I was still sooo sleepy. We had dinner at home with relatives from the mother's side since it was my father's side for lunch. We also had an Easter Egg hunt. No money there, though. =(

Basically, that was how my Holy Week went. It may not sound holy but I really got to sacrifice a lot of things that week. I had time to reflect and pray. Hope you guys had a meaningful Holy Week too!

I changed my layout! It's really simple and didn't require much work so it's kind of crappy. But I hope you could tolerate it! I LOVE LOVE LOVE Fall Out Boy. =) Oh, yes I do.

I won't be sticking around still, I've got a leadership training tomorrow until friday. So, 'til I go online again! Adios, dear blogmates. Thanks for all the comments and tags! I already updated the links! =)

CIVILIZATION'S PLOT AGAINST ME

2006-04-09T21:22:00.000+08:00

It's Palm Sunday today -- the start of the Holy Week and it means: VACATION! I can finally sit back, relax and get away from the hassle of city life - and school. Tomorrow, we'd be going to our home in Cavite as we do every year. I'm honestly ecstatic! My vacation can finally officially start. I can finally take a dip under the warm (make that HOT) summer sun. You see, swimming for me is just like racing. I also feel that rush of excitement and destiny... you know, the feeling you get when you feel you're doing something right. Like it's completely natural to you and you don't feel conscious.

Of course this also means that I'd be away from my beloved computer for a WEEK. Goodluck to me. Oh, and get this, I can't even bring my IPOD with me since I can't find its charger. Civilization is turning its back against me. Hey, what have I done? I guess I'd just think of this as my sacrifice. Afterall, it is Holy Week.

Blogging back in a week! Hope you guys have a fun and meaningful Holy Week!!

Oh, and I'm recommending two things to you guys: the band PANIC! AT THE DISCO and the book GOSSIP GIRL (oh yeah, thanks to KARLA for lending me her copies... :D).

What day is it today? One Tree Hill Day.

2006-04-04T07:55:00.000+08:00

SIGNS OF TRUE BOREDOM:
1. I spelled pure boredom as puredom one time while I was chatting.
2. I'm always sleepy.
3. I'm studying CSS and I finally get it.
4. I'm always online.
5. I put up my site again. (Check out the side bar!)
6. I wrote a title that has nothing to do with this post.
7. I'm making this list.

I'm currently missing my old websites. If you didn't know, I used to maintain a website with visitor content and things other than my blog. I miss it and to cure my nostalgic state over this predicament, I've finally decided to put those sections once again here in my blog. I love blogger too much to move again. If you look at the upper side of the sidebar of my blog, you'd see the links to the different sections. Hope you enjoy and check them out from time to time. My collection is still young and can't wait to grow!

Apart from making my site extensions, I've finally put myself to work and written this essay (this was actually written weeks ago but has just been edited now):

WE ARE YET TO PROVE OURSELVES

Do you believe that we are referred to as a generation who has an undeniable case of moral decay? Well, at least that's how my grandparents see our current predicament. Most people today have liberal mind sets, sometimes even too liberal that they would fight for anything and everything they want regardless of how it will affect others. The only thing that matters to them is that they get what they want. Sad isn't it?

With all the new technology being invented nowadays, most of us have grown accustomed to the materialistic world. The latest trends have shooed away our worries for our grades and physical beauty has currently become a need to survive in this world. Most of us become overly worldly and selfish that we sometimes tend to forget our true purpose in this world. We forget that there are other people who also have their own hubbubs and problems to go through. We overlook the fact that all of us are humans and that we need each other to survive in this world. There are so many things preoccupying our mind that aren't supposed to be on top of our priority list, thus giving us the tendency to neglect even those problems that are directly under our noses.

But I'm sure that you agree with me that this has all got to stop. It’s about time we wake up and fly back down to earth. Let's face the harsh realities that we've subconsciously created when we were too busy with things that satisfy our earthly pleasures and desires. We aren't asked to literally follow our national heroes' footsteps and die just as they have. We are asked but a simple task -- selflessness. Living for others seems like such a hard thing to do, but we could always start with simple things like courtesy, discipline and awareness. We can make a difference. We should make a difference. After all, we are the only hope of our futures. What kind of future do you want to live in? Think about it; the future is in your hands.

AMIDST THE STARS I SEE

2006-04-02T00:11:00.000+08:00

Recently, I've been kind of emo-ish. I think Peyton Sawyer, a character in OTH has rubbed on me. Even my crappy drawings are Peyton-y. I've been pretty ~~depressed~~ bored these days. With nothing to do and all the time in the world on your hands for the time-being, I guess it's already automatic that your thoughts catch up on you. I'm making up for all those lost me-times during school days and it's getting me quite emo-ish. PLUS, I've made this pact with myself to swear off computers for a week. All the more reason to be emo-ish. Lo and behold, it did not work. My ,quote-and-quote, "pact" lasted for less than 24 hours. Not even close to a week. Sheesh. I'm computer-dependent. Talk about geek!

But today? Today is a whole different story. Other than the fact that I woke up earlier than 12 noon (I woke up at 6:50am, can you imagine?) and that I had breakfast, I met stars today up close, and not very personal. Stars are interesting, but can you guess which kind?

a. The gaseous bodies in space kind
b. The red-carpet, Daniel Radcliffe type
c. The rotating-above-you kind when you bump your head hard
d. The religious, political kind

I'm not really psychic, but if you chose D, good for you! As much as I'd like to see the more exciting kinds of stars (yes, even the rotating-above-you kind, because I think that it's a pretty unique experience) I guess I'm just stuck with old religious, political figures. Boring, right? Well, not for a girl like me. I was honestly awestruck, starstruck if you would call it that. A while ago, his eminence Gaudencio Cardinal Rosales had his very first mass here in the Philippines as a Cardinal and I was lucky enough to get invited. I was really inspired by him. He told us his story of how he became a priest and it was very humorous and touching.

When he was young, all he had in mind was to be a priest. He told this to his father and well, since he came from a family of doctors, his father initially refused because he wanted him to become a doctor just like the rest of them. But then his father saw that he was lonely and eventually told him to go ahead and become a priest.
"Sure, go ahead. Be a priest. But, be a good priest."

Cardinal Rosales sure did become one good priest, but the thing is, he never dreamt of becoming a good bishop, nor a good archbishop and not even in his wildest dreams, a good cardinal. Through His Eminence, I saw that hardwork, humility, service and selflessness sure do go a long way. I can't wait. Someday, I want to be just like him. I want to reach beyond my dreams.

These people that I've met today, I felt something tugging at my heartstrings. No, it's not that I'm crazily in love with them. That's crazy!

I felt pride. I felt proud of them. They are two figures who are continually criticized by people just like them and yet when I held their hands, I felt strength and conviction. I felt God working in them. These people are tough. These people are strong. You may think that this is all just an act, but they are one heck of individuals to act as good as that. Either way, I look up to them. They've achieved so much in their lifetime and it's not just for their own good, but mostly for others.

I'm sure I wouldn't regret saying that "I just want to be like them"

STARS, OTH, SUMMER,ANGELS, DEMONS & FINGER-ACHES

2006-03-26T16:09:00.000+08:00

Dancin' where the stars go blue
Dancin' where the evening fell
Dancin' in my wooden shoes
In a wedding gown
Dancin' out on 7th street
Dancin' through the underground
Dancin' little marionette
Are you happy now?

Where do you go when you're lonely
Where do you go when you're blue
Where do you go when you're lonely
I'll follow you
When the stars go blue
When the stars go blue

Oh, gosh. I am totally in lurv with this song. Maybe, for a while there, I might just like the egoistic, perverted character in OTH that is Chris aka Tyler Hilton in reality and I've always loved Haley James Scott, or Bethany Joy Lenz. Being the impatient, crazed-OTH fan that I am, I finally gave-in to downloading unreleased episodes of OTH. I'm so bad. Well, at least I'm not alone. Right, Karla? I've watched episodes 3&4 and am on the way to downloading 5&6. OTH is my drug. Must get some, NOW.

Summer hasn't been treating me as summer-y as I initially expected it to be. I forgot how I hate the heat and it's so HOT right now. I'm hot, hot as in I'm sweating even if I'm not moving. Yes, it's that hot. My mom's even making me type exams for my brother. Sucks for my brother, though. He still has classes. My hands hurt. My fingers are bent. I've typed-up 21 pages in a span of 3 days and I'm telling you, forced labor is NOT good. Seven more pages, and I can finally enjoy my summer without worrying about my numb fingers. Seven more long, gruelling pages.

I promised all of you a book review on Angels and Demons, I'm not really in the mood to type so I guess this would be one lousy and short book review.

ANGELS AND DEMONS Dan Brown

Angels and Demons -- from the title, you could already imagine how heart-stopping this book could get. From the moment you begin reading this book, you'd be completely indulged in a story filled with suspense, action and mystery. Dan Brown has a unique style of keeping things hanging which makes you crave for more. With a plot that seems too real to not accept, a great writing style, and the presence of my favorite elements for a story (suspense, realism, controversy, etc.) I give this novela 9.5/10.

LOADED!

2006-03-23T20:45:00.000+08:00

"Sometimes, you have to step outside of the person you’ve been, and remember the person you were meant to be. The person you wanted to be. The person you are."

It hasn't dawned on me that the school year is finally over. Since yesterday evening, that is. The days since I last blogged, which was actually last Monday, things have gone by in a storm. Moments were too fast to grasp and acknoweldge, time has went by pretty fastly for the past days but when the day finally came, THE day, it feels as if I don't ever want to let go of my sophomore life. Sure, this year has had pretty much more in-between's than life-altering down's and blissful up's but.. I don't know. I feel as if something is holding me back. I feel as if there's something more I ought to do. Unfinished business? Thing is, I can't really place my finger as to what this unfinished business could be. Maybe this is all just a facade, maybe there is a message that lies deeper within this sense of incompleteness. Most people say, or at least I think they do, that this kind of behaviour is a defense mechanism. Hah. Yeah right. Defense mechanism.. for what? More or less, that I could answer.

I'm afraid of moving on. I'm afraid of my Junior year. What lays ahead? Teachers keep on taunting me... "Third year will not be anything like your sophomore year. Be visible." My teachers keep on telling me the same thing each and every year. Be assertive. Can someone, someone please spell out to me HOW to be assertive! While someone teaches me that, I hope that someone also tells my teachers that I'm not shy on reciting. I just don't want to. What's the point... Why the heck do I have to recite?! Some of you may get frustrated with my attitude towards reciting... but I just don't see the point. Call me naive, I don't care. Shoot a bullet through my head, will you?

IDA Scott Taylor wrote: 'Do not look back and grieve over the past, for it is gone, and do not be troubled about the future, for it has yet to come. Live in the present, and make it so beautiful that it will be worth remembering.

And I finally found some solace in Taylor's words. Thanks for the advice, Taylor.

Despite all my rants, I hope you don't think that I'm not grateful with what I've got. Because, really... I'm more grateful than you could ever think I am. I never could've pulled through without my homies. Homies. Definitely not a word for me. NOTE TO SELF: Don't ever use that again. Thanks to my teachers, my parents, my friends.. you guys are the best in the world and I could not even imagine one second of my life thinking you guys aren't in it. My blog friends, my online buddies... you were all a part of it. You guys gave me strength and belief in myself. Thanks for sharing your opinions and comments with me. I appreciate them. VERY MUCH. Even though this paragraph is truly heartfelt, I think I shoud really stop NOW. I would stop right here because I feel like I'm giving some sort of speech. XD

My last day as a sophomore was pretty much spent with me sleeping. Well most of my classmates did anyways so what was I to do? But before our slumber festivities, we had a chance to thank the BEST adviser: Mrs. Santos! She rocks the house, people! She's one of those people who really care for their students. I love that. We gave her flowers, chocolates, marshmallows, a bag and plenty of easter eggs containing letters from us! I really am so grateful to have her as an adviser. She made my life as a student, friend and class secretary tons easier. KUDOOOOOOOOOOOOS!!

Aww. I'm glad we became close this year. I'm glad I became close with lots of people this year.

That's me, Nelly and Raissa... my group in St. Gertrude.

Kellylits and I.. :p

Rai2 and me..

I told you all we did was sleep. May the slumber festivities begin!

That's what we did, mostly. Cam-whoring and sleeping. But after the Recognition, we did anything but sleep. Kelly, Nelly, Raissa, Nikki and me decided that we had to celebrate elsewhere. Sleeping in school just wasn't enough. With my grandmother and mom, we all headed to Market! Market!. It was lots of fun, in my opinion. I really miss them actually since they belong to a different section (and fortunately they were all there), we didn't get to bond as much as we did when we were in first year. Oh, how we've changed. My grandmother treated us at this restaurant called "Seafood Island" and my eyes were totally big. I love my grandmother to death!! My mom ordered us this plate... more like PLATE because it was acutally a big tray with banana leaf on it. In the middle of the so-called plate was FOOD, and lots of it.

We're so full.. Ugh.

Say hi to the crabby!

Cam-whoring in Bench

owkiee...

Haha! Laging putol si Nelly..

We had fun tiring ourselves out going around the mall and eating and eating and eating. And eating.

SOME RANDOM-INITIES

It's hard to be in a section apart from your group in the previous year. Sure, I got cloer to a group in my current section, but it makes it real hard to be in two groups at the same time. Who to hang out with at a certain time? God knows who. It's so hard to decide.
It's hard to make a closest friend in your current section and still have a closest friend in another. It's confusing and frustrating who to hang out with most of the time. I don't want to hurt any of them.
Although belonging to two different groups at a time is both confusing and sometimes frustrating, it's always good to know that people care for you. Aww.
It's my first time this year to have a high mark in a declamation.
You can do alot with the YM avatar. Haha.
I love art. I've pretty much discovered it this year although I'm not really gifted in it.
Angels and Demons is total LOVE. I'm going to write a book review on my next post since I think this post is long enough.
We saw Imelda Marcos in the flesh in Market! Market! We were all so.. "woah!" Right from our history books! Hahaha...

FROM UP HERE, THE CITY LIGHTS BURN

2006-03-20T10:04:00.000+08:00

So here I am on a school day in front of the computer doing nothing besides checking my batchmates geometry papers. It's ironically both relieving and stressful that our exams are over. I mean, we don't have to go all ballistic and crazy over unreviewed lessons and nurture dear eyebags from the stay-up-until-2am routine. On the other hand though, it's quite stressful, if you could call it that, to be checking geometry papers. Who knew marking papers with a red ballpen could be so time-consuming and irritating?! Well now I do. Kudos to all geometry teachers out there! I look up to your test paper checking skills. Haha.

Here in the CAI Lab, I'm sandwiched between a Nathan-ogling Karla (Haha, Peace out Karla) and a Neopets-addicted Doris and with all the time to think (since we aren't doing anything) I can't help but think how close freedom is... how in just a few days,projects and assignments would never bother me again. Well, for two months at least. Dumdeedum. *sigh.* Freedom. It sounds so appealing to me, but right now, I don't think I want to leave school for a while because:
a. I'm using the school computer.
b. There's internet in it.
c. I'm with my friends
d. There's nothing to do at home.
e. Did I mention that there's internet??

Last Friday my Mom finally, finally gave in to bringing me to the mall besides SM Sucat. Finally. We went to Park Square first so we could inquire about my busted Video Camera which now I think has no hope whatsoever since according to the diagnosis, the lens is broken. Do you know how much the freaking lens is? Well, I don't know either but it sounds pretty expensive to me. I'm also in this predicament: Shall I sell my video cam or not? I guess it still depends if I can afford to send it to the repair shop. I hope I can because I'm eyeing this new digital camera. After that, we went to POWERBOOKS aka heaven. I bought two new books, the next installment of Mediator and Angels and Demons. That's all we did. We were in quite a hurry since we only had limited time. Boo.

That's it for now.. GTG!

Oh no, It's Crapland!

2006-03-13T22:21:00.000+08:00

A few more days, I keep on telling myself.

My desk is littered with cut up pieces of colored papers and unused thread, paint can be seen splattered all around my table, I'd suddenly realize there's glue on my elbow, I have to dig through my quiz papers for my cellphone.. yes, I see it now: Crapland. With all the projects I still have to do, I'm trying my best to define the word "Multitasking". It's working, but the side effect is glorious Crapland.

But then, despite my Crapland I tell myself: A few more days to go.

Well then and if you can't tell how much I'm anticipating the summer, go ahead and reread the first and third paragraph (They're not really paragraphs.. hehe). It's just that, I'm really excited to breathe in freedom. I'm looking forward to the feeling of not feeling anything that requires you to squeeze your brain and cause possible damage to precious, precious nerve cells. I miss that feeling of assurance that the next day, you wouldn't need to fret about forgotten assignments and pop quizzes. For me, summer is an escape. It's like my real New Year where I have resolutions and I really (mostly) get to accomplish them. This year, I've got quite a number of resolutions. It's time for me to change. Change my unwanted habits and improve on my talents and good habits. I've already thought of joining two summer classes (no not academic!!) and they're really things that I love doing most. This summer, I'm going to find myself. Everyone has this personal goal they want to accomplish and that is, to know theirselves because as they say, a lifetime is not enough to get to know your real self. I think that as a student, summer is one of the few occasions where you get to spend time with yourself. I'm not wasting this chance because I've wasted far too many.

Yes, just a few more days to go.

Nostalgia Strikes Back!

2006-03-11T16:26:00.002+08:00

Every person in this world should know that once you make me ride a go-kart (even though it's just home-made and runs on an engine of a chainsaw, as in my case), it would be hard for you to get me down from this high I would be experiencing. I love speed. That's a fact I don't hide from. I love feeling the wind blow past my face, and that feeling of excited butterflies at the pit of my stomache. I don't even care if speed means risking my dinner. It's just that, speed makes me feel special. Like I'm in control of something risky. Oh, I love taking risks. I've witnessed quite a number of near death experiences and I think that through time, my fear has morphed into a sense of excitement. Go-karting has temporarily taken over my mind, and now I can't seem to focus on my projects. That's right. Blame the car!

Have you ever tried to forget about something you really love? It's hard, isn't it? Especially if it was fun and really memorable. But what if someone or something reminds you of it? Frustrating right? I mean, you've worked so hard to forget about that thing, and suddenly, with just pictures, it all comes back to you. A wave of nostalgia hits you and you want nothing more but to forget about it, because you know that you'd be thinking about that thing 24/7 again. Yesterday, I attended the Pambato JCI GMM (General Membership Meeting). Ate Mariel was there and almost all the tito's who went with us to Japan were there. Haaa.. Such nostalgic memories they are. The meeting itself was quite long. Wait. Scratch that. The meeting was long! It was inspiring to hear all of the organization's projects that reach out to different people. Someday, I want to be just like them. Really. It's very heartwarming to know that there are people that actually care. After the LONG meeting, we just talked.. As in, we mingled with each other. No, they were not snotty business men in business suit they were far FAR from that. Haha! Tito Josel even showed pictures of our Japan moments.. Nostalgic.

Off to do all my projects!

Oh, and I have a gift to all you procrastinators out there! I read this from somewhere and it just made me go into fits of laughter.

If you're 21 years and below (up to 14), you can join Parañaque Pambato Junior Jaycees! Even if you're not a resident of Parañaque, you could join... It's a non-gov organization for leadership.. Basta, masaya! Wanna join? Just comment here or YM me, or contact me through email..

Over!

2006-03-10T18:14:00.000+08:00

I can't believe it. The exams are over. Wow. The notion of just having to sit back, relax and watch the rest of my classmates suffer sounds appealing to me. Unfortunately though, I'm still fully booked with quite a load of projects all to be passed next week. But nevertheless, I'm really glad since quite a big portion of my workload has been lifted upon me. All I have to understand now is how I'd do all of my projects. As they say, If there's a will, there's a way. I'm suire I'm going to find a way to make shorts, do a portfolio, write a book report and build a scale model all at the same time over a span of two dats. Wow. And I'm really elated with the fact that summer is just a few days to go and I can finally move on to a new life. Something that doesn't do much with squeezing your brain and temporarily losing your ability to speak and write. Ahh.. Summer is directly proportional to carefree bliss. Only a few more days of hell. I can do this.

Confessions

2006-03-01T18:20:00.000+08:00

One day, I was day dreaming.. and I was in Paris staring at the Eiffel tower. It was overwhelming! Breath-taking!
But that's life when you day dream. In reality, I was not in Paris.. nor was I staring at the Eiffel tower. Although yes, what I'm seeing IS overwhelming and breathtaking... You see, I am on my desk, looking at my pile of unfinished projects. I am OVERWHELMED with all the things to do and it IS breath-taking. But in that exhasperated-annoyed-frustrated type of way.

I've never really aired my addiction to OTH, right? Well here goes.. First of all.. have you ever heard of One Tree Hill? If you haven't, go buy yourself some TV with cable and ETC channel. It is one of the BEST shows ever! [OH MY, I just felt an earthquake and now it's raining hard.. cool!] Yes, I ,ORDER you to watch it. Even, I.. the class-dubbed freak who doesn't watch TV as a normal teenager would, LURVS this show to bits. If you're not into drama, this isn't really your thing. But I'm not also into drama, but this really drew me. You can relate to it. With all the things happening to your life, I'm sure it'd be easy to relate to. It's like this medicine I'm taking to keep me sane. But, I'm not sane right now cause, there's no OTH yet in ETC! They're about to start season 3.. but when? I can't wait anymore.. I have to get my hands on limewire and download.. just like what some others did.. haha. I can wait. I have no choice. Limewire doesn't want to cooperate with my computer.

That's just it for now. So much to do, so much to do.

And She Takes The Guilt Trip

2006-02-21T20:04:00.000+08:00

Jump!

Don't wanna think about tomorrow

I just don't care tonight, I just wanna jump

Don't wanna think about my sorrow

Let's go

Forget your problemsI just wanna jumpI just wanna jump

Oh, I love jumping. I've figured out that jumping is a great way to release stress and tension -- but not the suicidal kind of jumping.. just the normal kind. You know, the kind which gaurantees you 100% that you'd still be alive after jumping. Afterall, its main purpose is just to release... not end.

I'm sure that it's already quite evident how panicked I am with the nearing deadlines of seemingly endless projects. Well wait, why don't you scratch that out? ENDLESS projects is more appropriate. I feel so immature ranting about all these stuff. I'm just complaining and complaining and I'm not doing anything much about it. That is immature. But the truth is, I don't know where to start! I'd gladly start anytime, but I don't have a clue which one to do first and I don't have much inspiration to do anything much nowadays. I just don't know why. I'm not being the productive person I used to be. I've changed.

These past days, though I've been swamped with schoolwork, my so-called "breaks" (that actually reach two hours..) gave me time to think and look back. I've been doing a lot of reminiscing and it breaks my heart and also ironically gives me this sense of elation on how much I've changed in a span of one school year. Truth is, I miss the old me. If ever you've seen me around and you're a very good observer, you might have noticed how much I'm getting detattached with people. I do this every year and I'm sick of it because when my friends start to notice how much I've been spending less time with them, I know they might get hurt... I'm too accustomed with my loner-ish nature. I love soltitude. It kills me to be like this. I don't want to risk hurting my friends and create drama that's not needed. I'm such a freako. Reminiscing also makes me proud of what I've accomplished this past year. I've been more active (I'm not really active, but keyword here is: more) and less shy. I've done things that aren't really my thing which is both a negative and positive indication. Trying out new things and taking risks is good but the very idea of me posing as someone I'm not is another story. Life can be so windy.

I also noticed how pabaya I've been, how naughty I've learned to be, how... unhuman I've become. When I was younger, I always do my projects on time, not sparing any minute. I used to love doing them and really put my time into it, but now that I've entered this so-called realm that is highschool, I've just become... pabaya. Careless. The complete opposite of what I'm supposed to be. I've learned to do things that aren't really nice. I'm not as easily shaken by my conscience as much as before. This is just the sad part of it all. People say that this really is how highschool is supposed to be.. but I can't really help but press on -- Is it really supposed to be about being someone you'd regret you'd become?

Gosh, I'm supposed to reserve all this eye-opener posts for the last day of school, but I just can't get it off my head. I've taken it. I've taken the guilt trip. Somebody save me.

Because maybe

You're gonna be the one who saves me

And after all You're my

wonderwall

Please pray for those families in

the Southern Leyte Landslide and

the Zamboanga Landslide. Also,

the mercury-contaminated people

in SAS.

Losing My Mind

2006-02-20T07:44:00.000+08:00

My week has been pretty much hectic. I can't believe that I only have barely a month being a sophomore and it only means one thing -- projects galore and crammed lessons. Yeyness.. NOT. I think I'm going to lose my mind with all the things I have to do. School is such a pain in the you know where.

Filipino - Portfolio of Quizzes
Filipino - "Mapa ng Buhay ni Florante"
Geom - Scale Model
Geom - Notebook
Research - outputs
Research - documentary
CLE - Journal

And, I'm quite sure that there are more follow-up projects from the other subjects. Yes, I think that I will lose my mind. But hey, let's look at the bright side of things (wow, I'm being an optimist!)... once I get to finish all of these, I'm off to paradise! In other words: SUMMER, baby! I'm going to sleep all I want. When I was younger, I never understood why my older cousins prefer to sleep most of the time. I mean, when you're asleep you couldn't do anything productive. But now that I'm older, I understand how much sleep should be valued. It's like a treasure for people like us. You get it every chance you get which is rarely.

Time really does fly by.. but I'm not exactly having the best times of my life to say that time flies when you're having fun. My friends and I have been talking about our lives in the future, it's as sweet as reminiscing. We talked about what we want to be, which we apparently don't know yet. We talked about what school we'd want for college and promises were exchanged.. promises to stick to nearby schools. And, yes.. we're crazy to even plan out that we want to live in the same apartment. We've also talked about how we don't want to live in a dormitory or a boarding house because of the curfews. Barely two more years and we're off to freedom land... and we're pretty scared of the very notion of COLLEGE!

Oh, I changed my layout already. I dedicate this layout for February 18 because I loathe that day...

Just Another Day

2006-02-15T20:29:00.000+08:00

February 14 has gone by just like another day, nothing special. It's not that I was expecting anything to happen since well, technically, I am loveless. Nothing -- or rather, no one special to make the day special. I was just expecting something to happen, since well, it's a holiday... and when it's a holiday, it's natural for me to expect something. Bleh. I'm rambling

Last Saturday, my mom accompanied me to Baclaran so I could go and buy a dress for our cocktail party today. It was really fun. It was my second time with my mom there and even though it's already my second, I still feel as if I've more to discover about that place. Truly, it's a place for bargain-hunters. And, you cannot NOT walk slow there since almost everywhere you'd go, there would be something that would catch your eye. I remember the first time I went there (last week of January), my mom had to carry 18 pieces of salakot and I had to carry a mattress, not to mention those things we "picked-up" on the way. Just imagine how we looked like.

Later that day, we had our family pre-valentine celebration which we have every year. And thankfully, I've convinced my parents to go beyond the boundaries of SM Sucat. They actually approved of going to Glorietta, so to Glorietta we went that day. We were supposed to eat in this restuarant called Heaven 'N Eggs.. it was a totally cool place with the heaven-like ambiance and the indoor swings. Unfortunately though, it was full there so we just looked for another place to eat in. As much as we'd like to stay away from it, we ended up eating in the foodcourt. After eating, we went to.. *drumroll please!* TIMEZONE, aka HEAVEN. I'm a total arcade-computer-video game addict. So, really.. it was HEAVEN in there.

About the cocktail party, it turns out we aren't allowed to wear dresses since they fear that we would be wearing something too revealing. Oh, please! Where would I use the dress I bought then? Last minute decisions can be so frustrating!

Oh, and did you know that I disconnected my computer.. as in I removed the plugs, placed it elsewhere.. blah blah.. so I could study for the exams? That's right. I survived two effin' days WITHOUT my life support.

And as far as I'm concerned, I am NOT doing that again.

Happy Post-Valentine's Day Y'all!!

All the Hullaballoo

2006-02-07T20:39:00.000+08:00

I haven't updated for quite some time now. All the hullaballoo in my life has gone astray and it's all driving me crazy. I can visualize all the school work piling right before my eyes. And, gosh. I've just realized that I've only got barely two months to live being a sophomore. The intramurals was an OK one. Nothing exceedingly better than my first year but also, not really that bad to consider as the worst. If not for the inflatable (both the slide and the jumpy one) and the rides, I would have gone totally crazy with nothing to do since I'm not involved with the pep squad this year, giving me more free time that I apparently have nothing to spend on. *whew!* That was quite a long sentence! I'm just happy that I got to spend it with my friends although I had a dilemma. You see, I have my closest friends in the other section so my reaction for adaptation (sheesh, reminds me of biology) is to make a new set of close friends. So now, I have two sets of close friends that gave me a hard to time to decide with whom to spend my intramurals with. But, I guess I managed. Since last time I checked, both of them are still my clost friends. Oh, and I've finally managed to win something this year! The week after the intramurals (also translates to last week) we had our Science Congress in St. Paul Bocaue, Bulacan, and all I can say is that I'm a full pledged teenage girl. It's up to you to find out what that means! *wink, wink!* Since I had my barkada with me, I really got to bond with them more. We had our moments and it was fun. I'm sure we've produced a lifetime full of inside jokes that we'd be able to treasure even when we've grown up and broken apart -- which I would never want to happen, but it's only time that could tell. I'm also sure that we've defined "pigging-out" quite well during the congress with our "eat-sleep-hangout-bathe" cycle. We all felt bad coming home. Don't get us wrong, we love our families but then, the simple feeling of elation and freedom from intellectual tasks can be gratifying to the point that we would want that feeling to last forever. But hey, we've already woken up to reality and I'm glad I did so because the pile of lessons and assignments that awaited us resembled the Eiffel tower-- only in a more dishivelled, uninviting sort of way. And can you believe that our school scheduled our 4th Long Tests on the 13th and 14th? It's the day of love and the students of SPCPq would be spending it with piles of notebooks and books in front of them. A date with examination papers doesn't sound the least bit appealing to me. Why am I even complaining? It's not like the 14th has any significance to a loveless creature such as me, if you catch my drift. Oh, and have you heard of the stampede in Ultra where 73 people died and more than 600 were injured? Shocking isn't it? It just shows how desperate we people are to live, to have money, and apparently, we would even trample upon the life of others just to have the devil, that is money. Or is it poor planning? I don't want to elaborate since I wouldn't want to get sued even if I'm just posting my opinions. I mean, anything can happen in the world today, you can be sued for anything; all you need is to have the moolah. Right? I hope we all find the time for silence and prayer for all the souls that were lost that day, the souls that were victimized by him. Appaling how life can disappear as easily as a snap? How your hopes and dreams could be stepped on just like that. Don't be money driven, I tell you as early as now. There is more to life than what money can buy.

sayonara

2006-01-31T21:45:00.000+08:00

sayonara, 'til Saturday!

more blah's

2006-01-31T15:58:00.000+08:00

I've been itching to blog for quite a while now since I've spent my whole day in front of an internet-abled computer just reviewing, playing flash games, searching for different quizzes and staying away from drowsiness. Guess I'd just review at home. I can't really concentrate here... So maybe I'd just make a list of what to bring for the Science Congress:

- toiletries - clothes (dohh..) - DISCMAN (I can't find the charger of my ipod) - batteries for Discman - CD's for Discman - food - sleeping bag

Random-inity

2006-01-30T13:51:00.000+08:00

Guess where I am right now and what I should be doing!!

Well... I'm no psychic so I wouldn't be able to tell whether you guessed wrong or right. Heh. I'm just going to tell you.. I'm in school and I'm supposed to be reviewing for a Science Quiz Bee.. But before you go rolling your eyes and thinking of how lazy I actually am, I really am studying! I promise. I'm just not prioritizing it since I'm too sleepy to even concentrate on the proper process of photosynthesis or how traits are inherited and its different laws. I'm such an abuser, ay? I mean, we were allowed to use the CAI lab where there's apparently unlimited online access, and I'm sure that the teachers trusted us to study... and here I am blogging and checking out my different online accounts. Abuse. Abuse. It's all just a part of a teenager.. being a rebell and all. Haha.. Probably, by now you'd think that I'm bored to death. Cause I am. What are you supposed to be doing when you're asked to review for a quiz bee and you don't feel like it even though you want to? No matter how hard I try to concentrate, I just can't. I can't take in all the information I'm reading. So many genes, traits, terms, laws... and all those things. Gaaah...

I would like to take this chance to advertise my blogskins account which could be found at the sidebar..

Hope you understand all these random things I posted. I'm going to blog about intrams later on, okay?

... yehhhy! I blogged in school -- what an accomplishment!

Brace Yourself

2006-01-26T19:18:00.000+08:00

It's official! It's already the start of our intramurals. Actually, it started yesterday but it was formally declared by our directress today. Yesterday was... eventful. The day started off with a mass. No surprise there. Then we had a Pauliquiz (quiz bee about Saint Paul.) where I was one of the contestants. As usual, I didn't win. As usual meaning I've joined before (when I was in grade school) but have never won. After that.. hang out! But then, I slept the whole morning. It's the start of our intramurals.. and I slept. God, something is definitely wrong with me. My friends and I rode the caterpillar and the lover's wheel (that's what they call it!) when I woke up. And since I was moneyless that day, I didn't get to buy anything from the fair. Poor me. Kelly treated us to Greenwich in SM. I guess pictures speak louder than words, ey? Or is it actions? bleh.

We actually took it at the sidewalk, under the protective roof of the school behind us. It was raining hard and we were wet. We couldn't cross the street since we'd get soaked, so I called my mom who was at the other side and asked her for an umbrella. It was quite an adventure.. our pants were wet when we went to SM.

We ate in Greenwich. We finished 8 Garlic sticks and a whole pizza!!

The six of us. We call our selves the "Pizza Supremos" or something like that.

This piece of pizza represents are bond as a group. Each of us took a bite and...

since Raissa was the last one to take a bite, she had to eat half of the pizza in one whole bite!

I love strawberry and cream blizz!

After Kelly's blow-out, we went to school for the Hale concert... and, about that.. no comment.

Today was more intrams-y. In the morning, we had the Parade of Team Colors and the Aikido presentation and also the board game tournaments. All I can say about the board game tournaments: Thank the Lord, Alleluia, Alleluia!

That afteroon, we had the much awaited Cheering competition. But first, we had the contest for Ms. Intramurals. The fight was tension-filled, I mean, you could feel the tension and nervousness radiating from each member of the pep squad and the dancers. The skippers did well too!

I'm sorry for this sucky post, but I'm not really in the greatest of moods today. So, yeah.. Update you with a better one next time..

Oh and, CONGRATULATIONS TO MANNY PACQUIAO!!!

I'm Not Yet Six Feet Under

2006-01-24T19:04:00.000+08:00

Just so all of you know, I'm still alive. Just tired and very uninspired at the moment to blog about anything even though I've got lots of things to tell all of you.. *yawns*..

I've just been very sleepy, lately..

goodnight!

It's NOT sugar, spice and everything nice

2006-01-19T23:02:00.000+08:00

The top 3 reasons why I'm momentarily thinking
that life's NOT sugar, spice and
everything nice:

3. I'm feeling tired and sleepy all the time, even when I've technically done nothing.
2. My friends are not really much friendly when they turn their back from each other.
and the top reason why I'm momentarily thinking
that it's NOT sugar, spice and everything nice:
1. I just had a disagreement with my mom.

And, it always sucks big time when you have a disagreement with either, or both, of your parents. Even though sometimes, you've done nothing wrong and it's just them (hey! they make mistakes, too and I'm not ashamed of admitting it since after all, they too are human.). I guess it's written somewhere in the book of parent-child relationships that we should take in to consideration that our parents are always right.. or, maybe not always, but they do what's best for us. Sometimes, even though you know something is wrong about what they've just said.. there's still this line that gives parents power over their children to convince them to agree with them no matter what. You know the situation where the mom is a bad cook (mind you, my mom's a super cooker!) and when she asks you if her "masterpiece" tastes delicious, you've just got to say yes, or else you'd be hurting her in one way or the other. Parental relationships can be screwed up like that. I also hate it when they think you're making dabog and it's about them, but it's not. They get all pent up and say this speech that's already stuck in my head because they say the same thing everytime and everytime comes quite often to me. You know the speech -- "Lahat na nga ginagawa namin para sa inyo. Wala man lang ka consue-consuelo? Minsan na nga lang mauutusan, magdadabog pa!" . So far, that's one of the most hurtful speeches I've received. Of course, it's more intense than that.. that's just the uhhh.. cleaned-out version. Even though, I'm sure my mom or dad gets hurt with what I did, but I don't really get why it hurt me also. I know that I didn't go all -exhasperated because of them, but still.. I feel blamed. And it hurts to be blamed for something you did not do. It doesn't even help if that person is still mad at you. I mean, do I say sorry? This is always the hardest part for me because I know, and I swear that I did not go exhasperated because of them.. then why would I say sorry? I mean, there's no reason at all (for that situation at least because, I sure as hell have lots of things to be sorry about.). It just puzzles me. I mean, if I tell my mom I'm sorry, it wouldn't be sincere since I did nothing, and if sorry isn't said sincerely, it's just a party without the food. Okaay.. bad comparison. But the thing I'm trying to tell you here is that, if you say sorry and it mean's nothing to you... what good does it do? This sucks. I hate myself for getting into these kinds of dilemmas where I can't figure anything out. So I guess I have to say sorry now.. I hate when we don't talk to each other.

Intramurals next week!! GO BLUE!! GO BLUE!

Oh and,

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO KELLY!!

2006-01-16T22:12:00.000+08:00

I'm finally my normal self again. Well, at least I think I am. Nothing extraordinarily bad has happened since my last post. If you read it, good for you... and if not, at my last post, I was discussing how I had this feeling that something was going to happen. If I'm right, it was just my silly, little paranoid self. I am hoping I am right about that. I don't want anything resembling World War II suddenly happening. Right now, I'm getting a little paranoid about something not really concerning WWII or any macabre-related issues. I'm just getting a little paranoid of my little Scrabble game tomorrow (for the intramurals). Fine. I'm not just little paranoid about this not really so little Scrabble game, I'm super-duper-over-kadooper paranoid about it. It's just overwhelming how I suddenly think about this whole joining the board games thing. I thought it would be easier and a little bit less tiring. I guess I was wrong in some aspects. I mean, even though I am not really that much tired physically, boy am I tired mentally! Thinking all of those words.. it just pains my head ~~sometimes~~ a lot. Plus, thinking that you are single-handedly representing your team is just.. WOAH. If I were my normal self and never thought of joining Scrabble, I would've been in my normal, regular place as a Pep Squad member. A pep squad member free from the pressures of the idea that you'd be on your own representing your team. Wish luck to all the board game players tomorrow.. and, GO BLUE TEAM! Don't kill me if we lose. That's right, we!

I'm Such A Nostalgic Mess

2006-01-13T23:03:00.000+08:00

According to our Encarta Dictionary,

NOSTALGIA (n) sentimental recollection: a mixed feeling of happiness, sadness, and longing when recalling a person, place, or event from the past, or the past in general

That's how close I've been to figuring out what I'm feeling right now. For the past week, I've been thinking a lot lately. I've been thinking about our Science Congress when I was in Grade 6 – all those fun times we had. It was quite an adventure! My first year in high school… last year's Leadership Training… rappelling, meeting people, putting up with people. And most of the time, I think of Japan. One of the most nostalgic memories I've ever had. Yes, I've accepted the fact that Japan is but a memory stored in my local brain history, but the memory's not dead. I think of Japan every single day. The days I spent as an exchange student there were times to be remembered. Haaaa.. the mere thought of Japan right now brings this overwhelming sensation at the pit of my stomach.

But, nostalgia does NOT entirely fit the whole description of “What I am feeling right now,” -- what I'm feeling is a mix of happiness, sadness, frustration, anger.. blah, blah.. when thinking that there's something that's going to happen. No, don't worry. I'm not the next “That's So Raven” star, it's just that I have this feeling (which has been with me for quite sometime now) that there IS something going to happen. Whether it is tomorrow, or next week.. to whom or where, I do not know. The only thing is that I know something out of the ordinary is going to happen sooner or later and I have this big lead-on that, God forbid, it’s going to be bad. I'm no psychic, and NO, I haven't gone mad. Just like I told you, It's just a feeling and I am not enjoying every minute that this feeling brings me. I guess I'd just have to wait and see if this is really just my mind playing tricks on me. I want to get out of this situation since it is really screwed up to feel like crying at one moment but the tears never come, then feel like you’re going to cough up what you just ate (sorry for the visual image I just made you imagine, if ever you imagined it.), then feeling like you want to laugh all your heart out and then having this urge to scream it all out. So far, I've done neither of these, but I've got this strong urge to do it. But I won't. I don’t know, I don't think doing any of those will solve the problem.

I wish I could just forget this feeling so I could concentrate instead with the streamers and designs I'm doing for my sister's birthday party tomorrow that I've got barely an hour to finish, plus downloading infinite hula songs. Yess! It's my sister's party tomorrow. She has this hula theme.. and I am glad (ecstatic, even) I talked my mother out of wearing grass skirts. Or else I'd be dead before I even get to watch a concert! (Ok, lame goal..) She's already four… It seems just like yesterday when we never thought she'd make it through. But here she is, as healthy as her brother and sister, with as much energy as the both of us combined. Aww.. I’m proud of her.. and she's already going to school!

I'd stop my post here although there's still a whole lot more I'd like to rant about since I've been thinking so much lately. But I wouldn't want to bore you with my life now, do I? (I'm oh-so-cynical, and I know it.) Oh, and I might corrupt Blogger's server or something if I tell you all that's troubling me lately, but I'm not that selfish. Oh-kay, I'm stopping, I'm stopping.. but not before you go to my featured site! See sidebar for information. I'm stopping!!!

And one last thing, I currently like this Canadian band called Hedley!!

ON MY OWN Stayed awake all night toss and turnin' Now my blood shot eyes are burnin' Workin' out why this ain't workin' Fight after fight after fight And now it's killin' me You were too busy to believe in All the run away dreams I was dreamin' Time to pack up and go I'm leavin' Fight after fight after fight

And now I gotta be On My Own And living in a world alone Gets better every day That I don't have to say I'm sorry I'm coming home I'm gonna make it on my own I'll always take the harder road Gets better every day That I don't have to say I'm sorry I'm coming home

How'd you end up oh so jaded? Cynical and so sedated Can't live in this world you created Day after day after day

And now I gotta be On My Own And living in a world alone Gets better every day That I don't have to say I'm sorry I'm coming home I'm gonna make it on my own I'll always take the harder road Gets better every day That I don't have to say I'm sorry I'm coming home

You will always be the lonely one You will always try to swallow the Sun Just remember you could never make it rain on everyone

COMMENTORS: karla, rina, vero, patty, russ, athena,

Moving On

2006-01-10T21:07:00.000+08:00

I've been thinking bout the meaning of resistance, of a hope beyond my own And suddenly the infinite and penitent begin to look like home -- Stars by Switchfoot

The Year is finally looking up. Things are getting better than when the New Year came.. when school started. And look! I'm starting to be optimistic! For one, I have people to talk to again. Friends to nag in school, friends whom you can rant with. Cause when the vacation comes, it's really hard to keep in touch with them. Then, when school started, some of my results for the periodic exams were looow. I think, although I still think I am quite rattled from the holidays, that I've adjusted to the fact that Santa Claus has graced my home already. I know it's a pretty long time to adjust, but I guess the sloth in me woke up this year. I am glad it's recoiling into the farthest parts of me again because I have no room for laziness. I can feel it. I can just feel all the projects, assignments and hell this last quarter has in store for all of us. Another thing is that, I am assured that I will pass this certain subject that I have been fidgeting about. That was really a load of my back since it never once left my mind filling it with "what if's". I'm glad that's over. Oh, and I've finally bought this book I have been eyeing for for... months! Things are going right. But there's this one thing I am afraid of. I mean, you know the saying that "What comes up must come down?", I am so content right now, I am afraid of losing this feeling. Because I know there's no way but down when you are at the top.

blah's ** I've joined the scrabble for the intramurals and I'm starting to think if it was worth joining. I'm not really feeling the intrams feeling this school year. ** I hope my parents will allow me to join the Science Congress on the 1st of February to the 4th. I'm crossing my fingers here, putting on my halo and growing my wings!

Thanks to those who commented!

Oh, and drop by karla's blog because I say so! :D She's my featured blog for this month.. Now, GO!

So... Yeah.

2006-01-08T15:19:00.000+08:00

GOODBYE
Christmas is over and done with, the New Year has passed, this just reminds me more and more that there are lots of challenges I have to go through yet again, to go through with the cycle we call life.

I've changed my lay-out again as part of my it's school time and banish all memories of holidays and set our priorities to studies program. It's like I am accepting that Christmas and New Year is done. It's but a memory and there's always no good in dwelling in the past. So.. *breathes* ha, here I am. Little old me ready to face my big new future.

Things I'd want to do in my "BIG NEW FUTURE"
1. Stop procrastinating.
2. Stop cramming.
3. Have a more positive outlook on life.
4. Be more socially inclined
5. Learn to open up vocally, not just in words.
6. Stand up to what I believe in no matter how ridiculous others think of it.
7. Be a better friend, daughter, sister and student.
8. Be a better Christian.
9. Help mom in her work.
10. Think of more things to change

HELPING OUT MY MOM I think I have Ice Tea overload from yesterday. You see, I landed myself a little job in my mom's work and yesterday she had a function for Teame Media's Y Gen. It's a concert for the youth and by the youth. We sold food. I was assigned to give out Iced Tea. See the connection? I sat by an Ice Tea dispenser for a good 7 hours. I think I drank 10 cups! haha.. Not really, but close! It was actually fun. It was fun to help my mom and it was fun to push the dispenser thingy so that the Ice Tea would come out! Haha... I think I'd know what to do when I grow up and can't find a job! I'd be the lady who pushes the Ice Tea dispenser button for your Ice Tea pleasure! The concert was ok. There were bands which needed more improvement and there were bands that made it good. IT just warms my heart that the youth of today still care about things other than drugs and alcohol. We are, after all, branded as one of the most rebellious generations. That's according to our Lolo's and Lola's. There was also this modern reenactment of the musical Moulin Rouge. It was quite dragging (as the musical is), but I was in awe with the actors and actresses. Kudos to them!

I guess I'd leave it here for now since we are about to leave for my Tita's despedida..

HAPPY BIRTHDAY SISTER!!!

update you more when I get back! Plug the commentors later! :D

COMPLETE!

2006-01-02T20:31:00.000+08:00

The New Year has passed and I am proud to say that I am still complete... physically! No blasted fingers, no injured arms, no blown-away body parts. It's all good. Not that I did any lighting up of fireworks, I really just held on to Lusis (sparklers).

My New Year started out bad. Super, duper, ooper BAD. First of all, I forgot to jump at exactly 12, which as the old say, is for height! I want to grow taller, and to think that jumping at 12 is what comprised my thoughts most of the time so I wouldn't forget. Heh. Stoo-peed! That was one thing and the other is finding out that my video cam won't work! Gosh! I've been dreaming about this moment for a year. I wanted to document a fireworks display and hopefully.. hopefully learn how to edit videos. I've been ~~preparing~~. Ok, forget that. I did not prepare but I did not expect my camera to go haywire at THE moment! It was so frustrating since I expected it to work just like all the other days I used it. I never thought it would malfunction just like that. That made my New Year start out pretty badly. I cried over my camera. haha! Maybe next year.

Things started to look up when we went to our neighbor aka my Uncle's house to celebrate New Year which we do every year. A family tradition, in other words. It was cool. This year's food theme was Spanish. Every year, there's a new theme, I think last year it was Japanese. It was also fun to mingle with my cousins. You know, being kind of the oldest of them has some privileges. Like, teasing them.. and teasing them. I'm not that bad though! Haha.. It was fun playing with the sparklers. After that, we had our fireworks which brought us all back to little children... Ooh-ing and Aah-ing at the dazzling display of fire and lights. It was breath-taking. I LOVE fireworks. We even played with piccolo, bumble bee and all those other firecrackers! We had fun, even the oldies -- warped back to their childhood.

Fountain... pixelated though, cause I used my cellphone!

Fountain.. again!

After the fireworks, we had our toast. You know, for a good year, peace, good fortune.. all those things you'd want to happen. I now officially like champagne! haha. My day, or rather morning ended at 4am after watching Sky High which is now officially one of my favorite movies.

Later January 1, we had a party. This time for the Mother's side of the family and the staff. It was mostly fun. I actually had more fun at the after party when all who were left were the staff and they had a showdown! Never did I know they were great dancers! My Dad and I also made PIZZA! I was also deprived of my computer because I willingly let my cousins use it. Heh.

The 11 cousins!

I had a great New Year. Another year full of beginnings. Goodluck to me and the rest of the world.

blah's **

This was taken last December 28. To think that December is one of the coldest months of the year! It was really cold, I tell you! ** I promise to do my assignments right after I post this. ** I don't want to go to school on the 4th!!

COMMENTORS: Pauline, Karla, Vero, Patty and xuezi

Last Post!!

2005-12-31T15:16:00.000+08:00

Happy New Year!! Take it!

My last post.. for the year! It's the last day of the year today, and I feel like it's the end of the world. Really! I feel like I have to do this and that before the ~~day~~ year ends! Maybe because these things that I have to accomplish are my assignments I should have done last week, but because I'm such a procrastinator (is there such a word?) I've let my assignments stay idle, until this very moment except for some this and that's I did just to convince myself I'm moving on with my projects.. That's something I want to change..

As for my New Year's Resolution? Let's say I just want to be a better girl all in all. I've never accomplished a New Year's resolution, so I decided not to make a specific one.

Oooh.. and my new layout is.. PINK. I wanted to try something new... maybe this could be a good start for a new year, ey? Pink is not my color. XD

blah's

** I did not watch the Pyro Olympics!!! I sooo wanted to watch it, but certain stupid things came up. *groans*

** My dad put a whole 3x6 Cadbury Chocolate Bar beside of me and I am NOT supposed to eat it. I am only supposed to guard it. Bleh.

** I promise myself I'm going to drink a whole glass of Champagne this year! :D I don't like it's taste.. bleh.

COMMENTORS: Karla, Raissa and Patty

Seven Songs

2005-12-31T14:56:00.000+08:00

I was tagged by ATE PATTY.

List seven songs that you are into right now. No matter what the genre, whether they have words, or even if they're not any good, they must be songs that you're really enjoying right now. Post these intructions in your blog along with your seven songs. Then tag seven other people to see what they are listening to.

1. Poetic Tragedy The Used 2. Lights and Sounds Yellowcard 3. Para Sa'yo Parokya ni Edgar 4. Sandalan Six Cycle Mind 5. View From Heaven Yellowcard 6. Alapaap Eraserheads 7. Promise Simple Plan

I TAG: Karla, Rina, Raissa, Carla, Pauline, Teng and Nika

ahead

2005-12-29T15:25:00.000+08:00

In just a few more days (I can't believe it!), I'd have to get used to writing 2006 instead of 2005 in my test papers. Eek! School again. Bummer. But my main point here is that, New Year fast approaches! Another year will go by, a year with a share of its own ups and downs (mostly downs, though) will go down the drain towards history and another one is on its way to make a history of its own. If there's one thing I learned this year it's that a year is what you make it. Your life depends on you. I mean, there may be obstacles and all those crap that could come your way but it always depend on you if you would:

a. run away

or b. face it

If you decide to face it though, it still depends on your outlook if you'd be pessimistic or optimistic about it. Again, my main point: your life depends on you.

I'm saying this because this is my New Year's Resolution in summation.

blah's

** I miss my website. I think I might get one and move again.. hehe. But really, I miss my website!

** I want to write a hundred New Year's Resolutions and print out. I'd post it on my desk and cross away every little thing I've done.

** Only 1 year, 4 months and some days til I get to drive!

** I want to go KARTING. So bad. So, if you're going, bring me with you.. pretty or handsome please with a cherry on top!

COMMENTORS: Raissa Patty

My Post-Christmas Miracle

2005-12-27T15:34:00.000+08:00

can you gues what this is?

It was the night after Christmas (well, two nights to be exact), when I was off to dreamland. Although I awoke quite a few times, it was a pleasant sleep nonetheless. I dreamt that I was going to save the world from all the bugs then I heard a *craaack!*-ing sound. Heh. I woke up. Go figure. Our ceiling fell down. Then I continued to sleep... but WAIT! OUR CEILING FELL DOWN and the place directly below is the bed of my parents and my sis! They turn out to be okay, fortunately, other than a few splinters here and there, so being the compassionate sister-slash-daugher that I am I tried to sleep again. Of course, I checked to see if mom, dad and Clarisse were fine.

I tried my best to sleep but it was quite hard specially since all of them moved to my bed! I was irritated since I had such a nice sleep and they ruined it by sleeping on my bed AND spreading ceiling-dirt all over my bed.

I can be bad like that. But Oh, God am I thankful none of them were seriously hurt. This is my post-Christmas Miracle.

blah's **the picture is our ceiling ** I am super bored. ** I finally figured out how to edit my template.. :D thanks to all those who gave advices! ** I'm starting to list my new year resolutions... which I hope and pray I'd be able to follow ** I haven't done any of my two projects, cause I'm such a lazy a*s.

COMMENTORS: Karla Patty Carla

HOLIDAY CHEER

2005-12-26T11:59:00.000+08:00

MERRY CHRISTMAS! I guess I'm moving back to good ol' blogger! My host is always screwed up and I'm finally fed up with all it's down time. Call me the "Grinch" but hey! Even though it's free hosting, of course I still have to see my ~~money's~~ freedom's worth. At least here in blogger, I barely even see any down time! Well, I think I'd also be reconciling old blogger ties. I stayed here in blogger for a year I think, before I moved out to the free account my Daddy pays for. Uhh.. that didn't sound right now did it? I moved out to an account I am not paying for, therefore it IS free in my point of view, but my dad pays for it. So technically, it is free in my terms. Heh.

that's me

Enough about all those hullah and watchamacallits.. A BELATED MERRY CHRISTMAS EVERYONE! I can't believe it's already after Christmas. Next thing I know, I'd be on my way to school... EEK! Now that wasn't a pleasant idea because I have no intentions of getting out of this pleasant bum mode, for now at least. My Christmas was OK. To tell you the truth, it didn't really have that *ping!* of Christmas spirit I was inkling for. Does it come with the age? Fine, I'm still young. I'm just fourteen, but I guess it doesn't really help when you don't have anyone in your age group in the family, ey? My cousins are either too young or too old to hang out with me. Sure, we're close and everything, but there's always this connection that comes with your age. I couldn't hang out with my younger boy cousins... you know, they're at this stage where "Girl's are not allowed". If you were in another country, they'd say that Girl's have cooties. I don't really want to hang out with my younger girl cousins since, I couldn't relate with all their bratz and myscene dolls, they end up making fun of me. I don't see any fun with that anymore. I couldn't hang out with my older boy cousins seeing that they have left the party and heck, I'd just receive that "I'll beat up any boy that comes five feet from you" speech, which I actually appreciate but that's all we end up talking about and well, they keep nagging me if I have a boyfriend. eek! I couldn't go with my older girl cousins since they're happily spending their new lives with their new men. And well, I couldn't hang out with the Oldies (oops! don't tell them I called them that!) since.. they're talking about stuff I'm not supposed to hear.

So, I spent most of my Christmas sitting at a corner and observing all of them while laughing occasionally because of other's stupidity. Of course I still mingled with my cousins.. but just for some time before they kicked me out. heh. So much for the Christmas Spirit. THEMOMENTS: ** The reaction of my sister when she got a peek of my parent's Christmas gift to her, I'm telling you, she was like a shredder ripping of the wrapper of her gift... and oh! what talent.. she did that while jumping and screaming.

** When my mom, as a tradition, read my Great Grandfather's letter to my Great Grandmother which was so sweet.. even though they were already almost a hundred years old, they still managed to stay in love.. **The Food. Who disagrees with that? Noche Buena was especially my favorite. All the ham, the eggs, the bread.. and oh! The fat-loaded tsokolate or hot chocolate!

**I completed the Simbang Gabi or the Dawn Masses! Nine straight days waking up at 4 am! Okay, Okay I cheated twice since I attended the late night ones.. but still!! I fought hard to keep myself awake and I guess the sacrifice was what mattered most!

**I got to eat puto bumbong! YESS!

**I got money, baby!

**We celebrated Jesus' birthday! HAPPY BIRTHDAY, JESUS!

Hope you all had a Christmas that's full of love.

Catch you all later!

[EDIT]

My other site is weirdly up and running again after some days of "cannot-find-server"ness. I guess it was just a technichal check-up. But ohwell, I am here already and I have decided to keep this blog and make the other one a portfolio of my art. Not that it's any good, but I love art! Hope you get to check it out soon! This is my site: http://vindicated.95mb.com.

I can't seem to figure out how to change my layout here in blogger. I think I forgot already. Someone. Anyone. Help? XD

[/EDIT]